Richmond, VA

I'll never forget the first time that I ever saw the skyline of Richmond, VA. It was in July of 1971. My friend Pam and I were on our way to Virginia Beach. It was at night and I remember thinking, "Oh that really looks pretty!" I had no thoughts of moving there and it never ended my mind that within two months I would be living there. To me it was just a temporary place to stay while visiting a friend.

But one thing led to another which led to another. First I got a nice job at VCU (Virginia Commonwealth University) and then I got an even nicer job at St. Mary's Hospital. I loved working at St. Mary's.

So after I had worked there for two years, my Mom moved from DC down to Richmond to be closer to me.

But I still always planned to move from Richmond. It's not that it's not a nice place....it is....but it has just never felt like home to me. Now Ashland felt like home for many years, but that's another story. And I do love where Richmond is located. It's in the center of practically everything nice. It's only a 1 1/2 drive to the ocean, and a 1 1/2 hour drive from DC, (unless traffic is bad), and most importantly, only a one hour drive to the mountains near Charlottesville. And I LOVE Charlottesville! Always have and don't know why. For many years I had hoped to move there.

Now I have a confession to make.......People who are born and bred in either New York City or Washington DC are snobs. As a native Washingtonian, the only other city that even came close to DC in my opinion was New York. And I had a friend from New York who lived in Richmond who agreed that the only city that even came close to New York was DC. So we're snobs! And when I first came to Richmond, I considered it to be a hick town. I now consider Richmond to be a very nice town.....and I love how familiar I am with it now.....but it's still not home. Isn't that weird? I don't know if I'll ever consider any city to ever be home ever again. DC was certainly home.....Ashland was certainly home....but those memories are in the past. In the present, Richmond is just a very nice city that I happen to live in at the moment.

I do have some very nice memories of Richmond.....working at St. Mary's is certainly one of them. And of course, the night that my daughter was born in Henrico Doctors Hospital on Forest Ave is the major highlight of my Richmond memories. And then there are some nightmare memories as well. Working in the Federal Building was a nightmare. I HATED my job. And my last job working for a rental management company was also a nightmare. I liked the job, but my boss was very difficult to work with.

I plan to move from Richmond in late October and I have conflicting emotions. Part of me can hardly wait....a new beginning....a new city (Knoxville)....and even a new state (Tennessee). But the other part of me finds that the closer I get to that date, the more I feel sad and yes, guilty. Sad because I really do love being so familiar with this city.....but mainly sad because I will no longer be living in the same city as my daughter. Now I will be visiting Richmond regularly to see her and I know that I'm less than a day's drive away, but it's not the same. I feel guilty because I don't want her to feel sad at the thought of me moving. In other words, yes, I know that moving from Richmond is the best thing for ME, but is it going to be all right with her? I do know that when she lived in Minnesota for four years while in college that things worked out ok. I saw her regularly during the summer and during Christmas and I made an annual trip out there every Fall and with modern communication the way that it is, it sometimes seemed as though we were still in the same town. And also, since the lease on this house is up in October, I would be leaving Richmond for a while anyway, to mainly travel around the country. So there you go. But I still feel conflicted.

I do think that once Kevin's children are through with college that we will travel the country together. And we'll probably end up settling down somewhere in between his children and mine. But who knows? His daughter, Jenna, might just end up in Arizona, where her boyfriend is from. But Sean will probably always remain in Knoxville and Valerie will probably always remain in Richmond. I guess that my "home" will always be where Kevin is. He is the first man in my life whom I have EVER fully committed myself to. Ever. I think that it's because when we first met, we were both going through so much pain (the loss of our spouses)....and have continued to travel through pain together (the unexpected death of his little sister and upheavals with some of my family members)....and still have more pain to face together in the future since his beloved mother-in-law was just diagnosed with Stage Two cancer. And when two people go through that much pain together just in the first year and a half of knowing each other....and go through it with getting closer each and every day.....then a true and lasting emotional commitment is made. I can not imagine a life without Kevin. No.matter.what. And part of that is because I KNOW that he loves and accepts my daughter (and my dogs) and that he always will. (Same as I will always love and accept the people and things that are important to him). I've never had that feeling from a man before.....that no.matter.what.he will always love me ....I know that he'll always be on my side....I've learned that he will never intentionally hurt me. And what a gift that is!

So anyway, there you go. Since my days of living in Richmond are numbered, I am making as many memories as I can, so that when I come back here for visits, all the good memories will always come with me.